Understanding and Responding to Sibling Sexual Harm and Abuse: A Vital Resource
I read an extraordinary research review authored by Dr Elly Hanson. Published by NSPCC Learning in November this year, it is titled: Understanding and Responding to Sibling Sexual Harm and Abuse. This carefully researched report provides an insightful analysis of harmful sibling sexual behaviour (HSSB) and sibling sexual abuse (SSA). It offers a vital resource for professionals, families, and anyone seeking to understand this complex and often hidden issue. It also offers realistic hope for families who navigate the long path forward once the abuse comes to light.
I have shared the public link to the research review at the end of this blog; however, the NSPCC shares that:
‘This report examines the prevalence of sibling sexual harm and abuse, the nature and dynamics of this type of harm and the different risk factors for children and families.
Sibling sexual abuse sits within a broad range of sexual behaviours between siblings, including those behaviours which are problematic or harmful but not necessarily abusive. The report explores how different definitions and understandings of sibling sexual harm and abuse can impact professional practice.
The discussion and findings are informed by a review and analysis of qualitative and quantitative research on this topic from 1980 to 2024.
The research reviewed in the report provides a basis for developing good practice principles in understanding and responding to sibling sexual harm and abuse. The report aims to inform and support the development of services to help meet the needs of children and families experiencing sibling sexual harm and abuse.’
As Brandy Black, co-founder of 5Waves, commented on LinkedIn:
‘I highly recommended this report for professional responders to learn about sibling sexual harm and abuse. The 30-45 minutes they would spend reading it would be the most time-effective, cost-effective way to begin to learn what they need to know. I hope this is used, shared, and cited widely!’
Insights from lived experience
As someone who lived through sibling sexual abuse, I was feeling a little like Noddy as I read. My head was nodding often in agreement and also in appreciation for the points that were being raised. It will also be an emotional read for you if you’ve been there too or are from a family affected by SSA. I saw many of the same researchers being cited that I read when drafting Resolve. However, there were more that I hadn’t come across. So, I took time to read and absorb it, not just skim through it.
It was so good to read a publication specifically about sibling sexual abuse (SSA) and harmful sibling sexual behaviour (HSSB).
Two important insights I will share from my read:
- The importance of addressing late disclosures. Many survivors wait 20+ years to speak about what happened to them. So, childhood disclosures vs adult disclosures was a question mark for me. That delay means that families face SSA’s impact long after childhood, with parents navigating their own midlife challenges when their adult child’s disclosure arises. This dynamic creates a unique set of needs for survivors, parents, and families, and it highlights an area where more support is urgently needed. The research review, however, was focused on supporting the children and the parents, not adult children and parents.
- The other was about the impact on parents. Timely, as next Friday, I’m having a unique experience of being on a podcast with Brandy Black and Dr Amy Meyer. Brandy is going to share from a parent’s perspective, and I’m sharing from an adult survivor’s perspective on matters including adult disclosure, abandonment, anger, and more. We’re doing two episodes, but before Christmas, we’ve squeezed into Dr Amy’s calendar for one recording. The episode has been planned for a long while, so it hit me today to read these words:
“The sexual abuse of one’s child is for most parents a significant personal trauma. Typically parents experience an initial shock reaction (McCarthy, Cyr, Fernet & Hébert, 2019), and their stress increases and mental health worsens (Davies & Bennett, 2022).
It is unsurprising therefore to find that professionals supporting families affected by sexual abuse have described the parents in SSA cases as the most distressed and overwhelmed:
‘These parents are in such a state of anxiety. They are on the edge’ ‘When parents arrived because of SSA you can see how they are broken. They enter the room with such heaviness, and they look totally different from parents whose child was abused by someone else [not a sibling]” Professionals working in a child advocacy centre quoted by Tener et al. (2020)'”
What others are saying
Professionals across the globe are praising this report for its depth and practicality. A colleague from Finland shared:
‘At least here in Finland, we urgently need more information and support for parents and families affected by sibling sexual harm and abuse.’
Another called it:
‘One of the top resources currently available to learn about SSA!’
Access the report
If you’re a professional responder, caregiver, or someone impacted by sibling sexual harm and abuse, it is a worthwhile read. It’s a comprehensive and insightful starting point. I also hope it will be shared, cited, and used widely.
Download the full review from NSPCC Learning here:
Alternatively, a short list of the key findings were:
Sibling sexual harm and abuse is complex
Professionals can find it hard to identify, understand and respond to sibling sexual harm and abuse. Identifying what has happened and why, as well as understanding the experiences of the children involved, is important when determining the best approach.
Families need to receive holistic support
Sibling sexual harm and abuse is often a severe and long-term form of harm. Professionals need to consider the wider family dynamic and develop a response that supports the whole family.
Safety, healing and justice are important goals following abuse
These core goals often overlap and intersect. Professionals should work with children and families to achieve these goals in different ways, without one goal obscuring the others. Good practice principles can support practitioners working with children and families. Good practice principles include: adopting a whole family approach; conducting comprehensive assessments and promoting reflective learning; and prioritising safety and preventing further abuse.
Reading this report gave me realistic hope that focused action was being delivered regarding SSA and HSSB. Good things are happening. People are working globally to create spaces where survivors and families can feel less alone and less stigmatised and get appropriate support. Education of professionals is being prioritised so that they are better equipped to provide the support that families like mine desperately needed.
Shared with love,
Alice
