The Discomfort in the Cycles of Death and Rebirth
In the journey of healing, accepting endings is often the first step towards finding the light of rebirth.
Alice Perle
Do you ever feel heavy, exhausted, or stuck? Is it as if some part of your life is in crisis or no longer fits?
In my eclectic path of healing, I have read a little about the cycles of death and rebirth. Have you?
Jennifer Bren, an intuitive healer, wrote:
‘Have you ever noticed that the darkest times in your life are often followed by a sense of renewal or growth? In Shamanic terms, cycles of death and rebirth refer to periods when part of us—be it a belief, a coping strategy, or a situation—is ready to die to make way for a bigger version of ourselves to emerge. However, embracing the discomfort of these cycles, particularly the endings, is crucial in the healing journey.’
Mikela and Philip Tarlow, the authors of Digital Aboriginals shared:
Those who do not regularly shed their psychological skin in order to become new again become old before their time. Death-rebirth rituals allow us to re-emerge in the present, free to perceive without the veil of personal history that may dull your perceptions and keep you from detecting the road ahead.’
Here are some indicators that you might be experiencing a cycle of death and rebirth.
- An area of your life (such as your health, finances, relationship, or work) is in crisis: This often signals that old patterns no longer serve us, but a part of us is clinging to familiarity, even when it’s detrimental.
- Things feel dense, heavy, and dark: Even outside of acute crisis, you may feel weighed down emotionally and physically, with a strong desire to shed something that no longer fits.
- You notice a regression into old patterns: Paradoxically, the resurgence of old behaviours often precedes significant growth. This can be unsettling but is a sign of deep inner work.
- Feelings of anxiety and instability: Transitions and change can trigger anxiety, especially for those with a history of trauma. It’s important to recognise that these feelings are natural responses to change, not failure indicators.
One way to explore this is through journalling.
A Journalling Exercise for you:
Take a moment to create space for reflection and gentle exploration within yourself. Grab your journal and pen, find a quiet corner, and use this as a guide.
Step One: Reflect
Identify what you are ready to release: Write down the areas of your life or aspects of yourself that feel burdensome or no longer serve your growth. Acknowledge any resistance or fear that arises as you contemplate letting go.
Step Two: Nurture
Bring loving attention to your inner child: Connect with any younger parts of yourself that may be scared or resistant to change. Offer them words of comfort and reassurance, acknowledging their fears and letting them know they are safe now.
Step Three: Honour
Make space for grief: Allow yourself to mourn the loss of old patterns or beliefs. Grief is a natural part of the healing process and creates space for new beginnings to unfold.
Step Four: Trust
Embrace trust in the process: Remind yourself that these cycles of death and rebirth are natural and necessary for your growth. Trust that the discomfort you feel is temporary and will pave the way for greater resilience and understanding.
Honour Yourself
By honouring these cycles within ourselves, we pave the way for transformation and renewal. The journal practice can be done regularly or as needed to keep you tuned in to when your own cycles of death and rebirth arise. It may help you navigate the transitions in your life with grace and compassion, even just a little bit more than you might have otherwise.
As people on our own healing journeys, we get to choose to embrace the endings as stepping stones to new beginnings, finding light and renewal along the path of healing.
Take care,
Alice
